At the fountain outside DP's Celebrity Theatre, Dollywood, Sept. 15, 2006Dolly arrives as the bluegrass band plays ď9 To 5Ē and she joins in and sings, chiding the crowd for not singing along.
Thatís all I know of that song! Do you know anymore? Well, alright. You wanna finish it, or are you just gonna play right on through? Go ahead. Do your, yeah. Do your thing. I wanna hear what you had worked up. Letís listen to them for a minute. You know Iíll talk all day anyhow. Ha-ha!
(Band plays) Thatís very good, ainít it. (Applause.) Yeah! How Ďbout a nice hand for this great band there. Thank you guys! Well, anyway, how are you? (Applause.)
I tell you, I am so excited to be here. And, boy, what a perfect day to go to Dollywood! Right? I donít know what all weíve got to talk about, but I know Iím very excited to be here at Dollywood. And of course, you know, this is our big bluegrass kick-off. And weíve got all sorts of wonderful things that weíre gonna be doing today. And weíre gonna be cookiní some, and of course, you know all about the, how, how great weíve done this year because itís been the hottest summer in, in years, if not ever, and weíve just had a good crowd every day. And, of course, the gas prices have been awful. Everybody didnít want to go far, so we came here.
And so weíve just done really good this year, and I just want to thank you, Ďcause you know I need the money. (Audience screams.) And you know why I need the money, right? (Screams.) ĎCause (audience says it with her) it-costs-a-lot-to-look-this-cheap, right! (Screams.)
Anyway, weíre very excited this year because we have a lot of wonderful things goiní on, and this year I have a, a new cookbook out. (Screams.) Itís a, but itís gonna be out in about four weeks. Theyíre still workiní on it. We were hopiní against all hope that we were gonna get it all done and get it here today. But you know how it is with publishers and pictures and all that, we could not meet our deadline, but we wasnít gonna let that slow us up any.
And so, anyhow, weíre gonna do a drawing today. And, a, (Screams.) yeah! And see who, that youíre gonna win me! (Screams.) Itís like taters, beans and me, instead of coffee, tea and me! But, anyhow, Iím just rambliní all over. Theyíve told me to do a whole bunch. Oh, yeah, and I was gonna mention that a little bit later on weíre gonna cook somethiní out of my cookbook with Chef Fritz. We had him last year, you know, heís from Sara Lee. And, of course, weíre gonna, weíre gonna do all that. But anyway, I just wanted to let you know that we got Ricky Skaggs over next door. Heís gonna be doiní shows from, at noon and 4. And Iím gonna be around on the park all day. Iím gonna be ridiní in the parade and all sorts of great things.
So, I suppose if this is where weíre gonna do our cookiní? Yeah? Can I bring the chef up? Iím gonna need an apron, though! And, course, my cookbook is called Dixie Fixinís. And, you know, of course, that all the money that we make from it goes to the Dollywood Foundation. How Ďbout a nice hand for Chef Fritz? (Applause and screams as he enters the stage.) Come on! Hey! Hey! I know weíre gonna cook somethiní out of the cookbook. Whatís itís gonna be?
FRITZ: Well, Iíve actually got two things. And as you know, I go around the country cooking all the time, and Iíve got a secret to tell.
FRITZ: I use some of your recipes. So weíre going to do some of those today. Weíre going to do your country potato salad and southwestern chicken with cocoa rub.
DOLLY: Yeah. Well, anyway, thatís gonna be good. Whatever you cook, I know is gonna be good. Now, I, of course, have to get rigged up for this. I have to have an apron on. So, come on, put that on, honey. (Steve Summers comes on stage with Dollyís apron to put it on her.) Is that the right way?
FRITZ: She deserves an applause just getting the apron on. (Screams and applause.)
DOLLY: No, I think he deserves an applause. A man that good lookiní youíd better be taking clothes off, not puttiní clothes on! (Laughs.) Ha-ha! Heís the one that designed my little outfit for the cookbook. Didnít he do good? (Screams.) Steve Summers!
FRITZ: (Holding a chefís hat) Are we going to try this today, because your hair sure does look pretty, and I donít want to be the first one to mess it up.
DOLLY: Well, just donít knock it off! (Laughs.)
FRITZ: Well, why donít we. Weíll just get about this close and . . .
DOLLY: No, you go ahead! Put it on!
FRITZ: You ready?
DOLLY: Yeah, I guess, if itíll fit.
FRITZ: Itíll fit. (Puts the hat on her.) There you go.
DOLLY: Is it on?
FRITZ: I donít know.
DOLLY: Now, you know thatís gonna fall off. Itís a good photo op. Let me, let me get back. (Screams as Dolly poses.)
FRITZ: You wanna come help me today?
DOLLY: Yeah! Iíll come do it!
FRITZ: You wanna have some fun?
DOLLY: You tell me what to do. Now, you . . .
FRITZ: The first, the first thing we have to do, and weíre gonna, weĎre gonna actually present the southwestern chicken with the potato salad, kind of a combination thing, and what the cookbook describes. Did yíall see the cookbook? (Screams.) Iíve got a copy. Alright, Iíve got my own personal copy.
DOLLY: You do. Itís got a lot of pictures. Itís got a lot of funny stories from my life. And of course, we got a lot of good stuff, talks, a lot of my mamaís recipes. And.
FRITZ: All of Ďem work.
DOLLY: Oh, yeah.
FRITZ: Every single one of them work. And I also understand there are a few select copies for sell right over here in the pink booth. And there are prizes being given away if you buy a cookbook, but I think theyíre going to go real fast. I donít think thereís a bunch of them over there.
DOLLY: And you know we did the big drawing, too, with the cookbook. That later on, Iím gonna be (Screams from crowd.) Actually, somebodyís gonna win, like, where I, we have the big barbeque cook-off, and Iím goiní to somebodyís house and cook out.
DOLLY: And Iíll be doiní . . .
FRITZ: Uh-oh. .
DOLLY: some recipes from the cookbook for that. Itís, itís . . .
FRITZ: Iím, Iím gonna take this before we lose it altogether. (Removes her hat.)
DOLLY: Take it off, yeah. I donít, I forgot, I, I got enough on my head!
FRITZ: Alright. So weíre gonna make your rub, and your rub is real fun. And what Iíve got you here for you is some ingredients and a little spoon, and you put, if youíll just listen to me youíre gonna put some of the things in the bowl to make the rub to put on the chicken.
DOLLY: Oh, Iím gonna do it?!
FRITZ: Youíre just gonna make the rub.
DOLLY: OK. Alright.
FRITZ: Ok, so sheís got cocoa powder.
DOLLY: Now, Iím a messier cook than him. I can assure you of that. I just use my hands.
FRITZ: And the unique thing about the, about the recipe is that it actually has chocolate in it. And I think thatís really neat. So,
DOLLY: Well, that is. How much of this do I put in here?
FRITZ: You did good. A tablespoon of cumin. Uh, kosher salt, which is a little bit heavier grain.
DOLLY: Oh, itís just fit to eat. OK. Weíre just hillbillies out here. Nothinís fit to eat but itís good. If itís got a lot of lard and butter and bacon grease, right. Thatís what makes it good.
FRITZ: Some chopped garlic.
DOLLY: It ainít kosher, though.
FRITZ: It is. Some chopped garlic.
DOLLY: Chopped garlic. How much of that?
FRITZ: A little bit. Youíre doing great.
DOLLY: Just a little bit, yeah, I donít know . . .
FRITZ: Thatís what is says in the book, ďa little bi-it.Ē
DOLLY: A little bi-it.
FRITZ: And then three tablespoons of chili powder.
DOLLY: Three. Thatís a teaspoon. So how much is that?
FRITZ: There you go. One.
DOLLY: How many of themíll make a tablespoon?
FRITZ: Two. (Laughs.) One more.
DOLLY: One more!
FRITZ: There you go. Now, stir that around a little bit.
FRITZ: Alright, looks good. And now all you gotta do is sprinkle that over the chicken. Now, in the magic design of our television kitchen. Look, look how well you did! (He pulls out a plate of pre-rubbed chicken.)
DOLLY: Ha-ha! Oh, my Lord!
FRITZ: Itís already over here seasoned.
DOLLY: I know, look at this. I wish we had a camera. Wouldnít we make a good team on television for one of those cookiní shows? (Screams.)
DOLLY: Yeah, Dolly and Chef what?
FRITZ: Dolly and Chef Fritz. Thatíd be a lot of fun.
DOLLY: So, now, do I pour that on?
FRITZ: Sprinkle it generously.
AUDIENCE MEMBER: And Chef Paula!
DOLLY: OK. Ha-ha!
FRITZ: Sprinkle it generously. And itís okay to sprinkle this about half-an-hour, hour before and let it marinate. The salt and the cocoa powder actually as, act as a marinade.
FRITZ: And the flavor profiles get stronger. So Iím gonna move this over to our magic kitchen, now.
FRITZ: While thatís cookiní, weíre gonna have some fun.
FRITZ: I love this potato salad recipe. Itís really fun. But itís very, very simple to do. First, all you do is have to add some potatoes. So, if youíd drop some into that bowl, Iím gonna hold the bowl for you.
DOLLY: Now is this, is this out of my cookbook?
FRITZ: This is out of your cookbook.
DOLLY: Well, Iím supposed to know how to do that, right? (Laughs.)
FRITZ: Well, we canít expect you to remember everything.
DOLLY: Oh, I remember tater salad!
DOLLY: I would know how to do that. But like I say, I ainít this neat when Iím doiní it.
FRITZ: You know . . .
DOLLY: How many do you want?
FRITZ: It, it, it took me five or six times in rehearsal today to learn the word tater. But I finally got it.
DOLLY: You didnít know the word tater?!
FRITZ: I, I thought it was a tomato.
DOLLY: Now, thatís a mater! (Laughs)
FRITZ: It said ďtater salad.Ē
DOLLY: Thatís a mater.
DOLLY: Tater and mater. (singing) Some say tomater, some say tomata, some say mater.
FRITZ: When in Eastern Tennessee, do as they do. There you go.
DOLLY: (Singing again) Some say potater, some say potato, some say tater. (Laughs)
FRITZ: The next thing that weíre gonna do is weíre gonna add celery. Thereís your chopped celery.
FRITZ: OK. Add what youíd like.
FRITZ: And then, if you could, it calls for only sweet pickles. So hereís some sweet pickles. Down in there.
DOLLY: Got some right in here.
FRITZ: Now hereís a unique thing, Dolly. I thought this was a nice thing about the recipe. It calls for chopped eggs. (He begins rapidly chopping eggs around his hand without looking down.) Now whenever you chop eggs.
DOLLY: Watch your hand!
FRITZ: Donít show off. (Still chopping.)
DOLLY: Oh my God!
FRITZ: Thereís nothing worse than a show off chef.
DOLLY: I wouldnít do it. I wouldnít do that.
FRITZ: Could you see that out there?
AUDIENCE MEMBER: No.
FRITZ: I get an applause for that alone.
DOLLY: Now I think so. How Ďbout a nice hand for him? Youíre like one of those guys in those Japanese restaurants. (Applause.)
FRITZ: Weíll do it one more time. I only missed once. (Holds up hands.)
DOLLY: Youíre missing it. Heís actually doing that with his fingers right on it.
FRITZ: Dolly. We got a mirror today for you. Theyíre watching everything weíre doing
DOLLY: Oh, theyíre watching?! (Audience members yell that they canít see anything in the mirror thatís above their heads. Fritz adjusts it.) You canít see the mirror? Well, thatís alright Ďcause then you wonít have to see what a mess Iím making here. How Ďbout a nice hand for him?
FRITZ: OK. Then weíve got chopped scallions. And while Iím chopping the scallions, will you put in a couple of scoops of mayonnaise.
DOLLY: Uh-huh! I love this part. (Laughs.)
FRITZ: Now. Now hereís whatís neat. We made that mayonnaise fresh here on the park.
DOLLY: Did you really?
FRITZ: Now, we donít buy . . .
DOLLY: Have, have eggs and . . .
FRITZ: We donít buy, we donít buy store-bought mayonnaise. We make mayonnaise. Did yíall see that?
DOLLY: Can you see him? You prob . . .
FRITZ: Always pay attention to the cutting board. Never look up. (He looks up.)
DOLLY: If weíve got that mirror, theyíre, theyíre lookiní right down my dress, ainít ya? My shirt? (Laughs.) Thatís why I wore a teddy! (Laughs.) Me and teddy got a good thing goiní there with Chef Fritz.
FRITZ: Now, hereís the next thing that I thought was really nice, Dolly. Thereís fresh dill in the recipe.
FRITZ: And, you canít find a whole lot of fresh dill around here. Now, where are we, Eastern Tennessee?
FRITZ: Alright, but somehow they went out and got it for you . . .
DOLLY: We got some . . .
FRITZ: You must be famous.
DOLLY: I am, I guess.
FRITZ: There you go.
DOLLY: ĎCause thereís a lot of stuff . . .
FRITZ: Now weíve got some fresh dill for flavor. It calls for salt and pepper, but we have Dollyís rib rub. Iím gonna give you a couple of rib rub shakes.
DOLLY: Youíre gonna rub my ribs right in front of all them? Ha-ha! (Laughs and screams.)
FRITZ: Oh my goodness, I canít believe youíve startiní on that!
DOLLY: We donít allow that kind of sexist thing at Dollywood.
FRITZ: All my hands are right here! And then the last thing is white vinegar, okay? Now.
DOLLY: Uh-huh. I love the vinegar in potato salad. I . . .
FRITZ: They came up and checked this three times. They said it was shine.
DOLLY: I think that is moonshine. That ainít got no label on it. (Laughs.)
FRITZ: Well, letís just put some in there.
DOLLY: I got my own still, too. I bought the old mountain home, and I kept the still.
FRITZ: And then, to finish it off an make it gourmet and fancy, a little bit of heavy cream. And there youíve got it. And here it is, Dolly, if you want to go and show everybody. This is Dollyís country potato salad.
DOLLY: Youíre gonna hold that while I show Ďem?
FRITZ: How Ďbout if I hold it, bring it over there.
DOLLY: Well, I started to say, why donít you show Ďem? I donít need that on me!
FRITZ: And thatís it. And Dolly makes those roses. Isnít that wonderful? (Screams.)
DOLLY: He lied. I did not make those roses. Heís all show. Ha-ha! But I could! I do! What?
FRITZ: I think they want to see you on that side.
DOLLY: Well, I think, oh, you didnít get to see any of that! But you know what, youíre gonna get to eat some of it, right? In fact . . .
FRITZ: Thatís right. Weíre putting it together right now.
DOLLY: Weíre gonna haul this around. And you know what, something else I wanted to mention while weíre just cookiní and talkiní, uh, when we were talkiní about the cookbook and the, uh, Dollywood Foundation and the Imagination Library. Dixie Stampede and Dollywood put a whole bunch of money, like $300,000 each into the Dollywood Foundation and the Imagination Library for the children there, so ainít that great1 With all, with everybody pitchiní in! (Applause) And then when you buy the book, you can only get this, as I mentioned, at Dollywood and at the, at the Dixie Stampede and on, ah, you know, through our website here at Dollywood. So, later on we may take it public if I do good. But thereís some really good recipes in it, but itís for a very, very good cause as well. Now who we got here? (Another chef enters the stage.)
FRITZ: This is, uh, my executive sous chef, Dennis Talbot.
DOLLY: OK. How are you?
DENNIS: Iím fine. How are you, Dolly?
DOLLY: Good to have you here.
DENNIS: Well, thank you. Itís great to be at Dollywood. Just love it here.
DOLLY: Great. So, now, what are we doiní now?
FRITZ: Alright. Now, this is how weíre plating it. Youíve got a nice chicken breast there. You see how they came out, and the rub actually stays on in the cooking process and acted as a marinade. And I think thatís a real delicate part of the, of the presentation. You can actually smell the chocolate.
DOLLY: Yeah, it smells good.
FRITZ: Itís really neat.
DOLLY: And I love chocolate. You know what chicken mole is? That chocolate sauce, itís like a Mexican. They make a, a mole sauce. I donít have that in my cookbook, but thatís one of the things I love in LA I go, and to have chocolate. It sounds terrible to think about having chocolate on food, but the pepper and chocolate, if it donít have the sweet, is really, really good.
FRITZ: And whatís unique is there are pickles in the potato salad recipe, so weíve put down sour pickles on the bottom, the chicken around, and then the potato salad right on the top, and it makes an excellent dish. Now, this can be plated up before. You can do it right as it comes off the grill. You can do it for a lot of people, a little bit of a people. And then donít forget that little bit of dill garnish right there on the top. Now, you can take that out there and show everybody. (He hands Dolly a finished plate.)
DOLLY: Now I can handle that! (Crowd screams as she walks around the stage with the plate.) I can even take this over here! (Walks to the back of the stage again.) I can handle that. Look how nice that is. Look at all that dill on there. We got some grass on there. Next time, if my cookbook does good, we can actually do a whole bunch of diff, different recipes, too.
DOLLY: Yeah, we, we got a lot of good country things. We could do a pure white trash cookbook. And I could do. (Laughs and screams.) And thatíd fit me real good! And then of course we could we could do like . . .
FRITZ: Now just in case they get the opportunity, on 128 is the country potato salad and on 76 is, excuse me, 77 is the chicken salad. One more time, hereís the book. (Holds up a copy of the cookbook.) Right over here behind you is a pink booth, and uh. (A speaker makes an unusual thump.)
DOLLY: Whoís that? Weíre about to do a rap thing! Just go on around and get.
FRITZ: So Iíll take that. (Takes the plate.) Youíve got your book.
DOLLY: Iíve got my book. Yeah.
FRITZ: OK. And, uh, weíll see you out there whenever theyíre Ďa cookiní.
DOLLY: Well, thank you. Thank you so much. How about a nice hand for Chef Fritz? (Applause.) OK. Yeah, how Ďbout a nice hand for him. Course, we still got some other business to do now. We still have to draw the winner! (Screams.) I think we need, is this where I, I need to find out what Iím supposed to do. (Looks down at teleprompter.) Oh, it says right here, ďFirst you need to thank su-um pe-ople.Ē (Laughs.) It says thank the Penguin Publishers for the book and the Direct Mail Service. So how Ďbout a nice hand for them? (Applause.) And I already thanked Dixie Stampede and Dollywood. They raised $300,000, uh each, and I said that. And so now weíre gonna have David Dotson come up here, because heís the one that runs the Imagination Library, he and bunch of great folks that make all these books possible for all the kids. So, David, is it time for you? (David walks on stage accompanied by two security guards.) Whyíve you got, oh, you got guards! This is just like, I think theyíve already picked the winner, and itís in the envelope, so we donít have to like draw it out of the, the big bag like we usually do. So I will just lay this somewhere over here. Yeah, thatís alright right there. (Sets down cookbook.) OK. And then Iíll get to pick the envelope. How Ďbout a nice hand for David Dotson. Heís the one that does all this dirty work, and itís good work. How Ďbout, well, look, this is so official! Who are you? (To first guard)
GUARD: Jeff Lewis.
DOLLY: And you?
GUARD: Ron Patterson.
DOLLY: Well, weíre glad to have you.
DAVID: I asked for the UT Cheerleaders to accompany me, but this is what I got. (Laughs.)
DOLLY: Yeah, he wanted cheerleaders. I get all the good lookiní guys! I ainít even got one girl up here and that just suits me fine. (Laughs.) OK. Here we go! I got to make this official. Can you give me a,. a version of a drum roll? Like some, uh brrrrrrrrr. (One of the bluegrass band members who had played her onto the stage begins picking in an imitation of a drum roll.) Yeah. Yeah, thatís very good! OK. And the winner is . . . Mark Wolbolt. (Dolly said his street name here, but to help protect his privacy somewhat, that is deleted here.) Gatlinburg, Tennessee! Hey! I wonít have to go so far! We were ready to go around the country to have a backyard barbeque. And weíre gonna go to their house. They get to invite 100 people, and Iím gonna go entertain at their home. They can invite whoever they want. So Walt, or Mark Wolbolt, Gatlinburg, Tennessee. Thatís who won! (Applause. To a group of fans to the side of the stage) Sorry! Sorry, my little guys were hopiní they would win. But, anyway, weíre happy for them. So are we, what do we need to do. Are we gonna try to?
DAVID: Well, actually, weíre gonna try to call him. And Allison . . .
DOLLY: Oh, we are?!
DAVID: Yeah. (Alison walks on stage.)
DOLLY: Hey! How you doiní Allison?
ALLISON: Good. How are you?
DOLLY: Allison from WIVK. You know her, donít ya! How Ďbout a nice hand? (Applause.)
ALLISON: Alright, what we want to do, we want to surprise Mark and call him live on the air right now in front of everybody, and youíre gonna talk to him and tell him that he won.
DOLLY: Suits me fine!
ALLISON: Weíre dialing him up right now.
DOLLY: This is sorta like Regis and, um. (The phone starts to ring.)
ALLISON: Letís hope heís home.
DOLLY: Yeah, I started to say a, do, that happens a lot of time. Theyíre not home. Can I hear him? I hear the phone.
DOLLY: Hey. Is this Mark?
DOLLY: Well, this is Dolly Parton down at Dollywood. (Applause and screams.) And I just wanted.
MARK: Whatís this about? (Laughs.)
DOLLY: I, I just wanted to tell you youíre the big winner. Hey! You won me! What are ya gonna do with me?! (Laughs.)
MARK: Oh, God, no! (Laughs.)
DOLLY: Oh, God, yeah!
DOLLY: Iím gonna come to your house.
MARK: Oh, my. For real? (Laughs.)
DOLLY: For real! I was surprised that you were in Gatlinburg. We thought we were probably gonna have to go all over the country but this is gonna work out just fine. So, where up in Gatlinburg? I didnít go to school with you, I didnít used to date you or nothiní, did I? (Laughs.) Mark? (Laughs.) Are you there, Mark? (Laughs.) Hello? I think he had a heart attack! (Laughs.) Well, Iím gonna come anyway. Iíll revive you! (Laughs.)
ALLISON: Thank you. (She leaves the stage.)
DOLLY: Hey, thank you. Mark, if you, I donít know if youíre still on the air, but weíre gonna be cominí to your house. And thank you. Bye-bye. Well I guess weíre about to end this, so, uh. Is Ricky Skaggs? Hey, Ricky, get out here! (Screams and applause as he walks on stage.) Ricky, Rickyís over at the, at, as I say, at the DP Theatre at noon and at 4 today! I know you got.
RICKY: What you got cooked up here?
DOLLY: I got everything in the world, but Iím gonna bring you some over there.
RICKY: You burnt the beans today?
DOLLY: No, you should tell . . .
RICKY: Sheís a fine cook, folks, Iíll tell you. She sure is.
AUDIENCE MEMBER: Sheís a fine lady! (Audience screams and applause.)
RICKY: I said sheís a fine cook. Let me tell you. (Applause)
DOLLY: You gonna to tell Ďem the story about the beans? Once we were workiní together, um.
RICKY: The White Limozeen project.
DOLLY: Yeah, White Limozeen. Ricky produced that record, and we were workiní over at my house. And you tell the rest.
RICKY: Well, we got in the big business. She, she put her some leather britches on for Carl.
DOLLY: Thatís beans.
RICKY: ĎCause he loves them . . .
DOLLY: Thatís dried beans.
RICKY: Thatís right, he loves them leather britches, and he only gets one or two messes a year. And, theyíre like gold, you know, leather britches is. You know, you, you, work a long time.
DOLLY: We call Ďem shav beans. We call Ďem shavs. You call Ďem leather britches.
RICKY: And, uh, so we got in there and got to listening to demos. And got to singiní, got to fooliní around, and listeniní to music, singiní. And, and uh next thing I know, Carl was screaminí, and the, the kitchen was full of smoke, and Dolly had let them beans burn.
DOLLY: And Carl has hated you since that day. Ha-ha!
RICKY: Wanínt my fault.
DOLLY: He said you had . . .
RICKY: I wanted some of Ďem as bad as he did!
DOLLY: I know you did, but anyhow . . .
RICKY: Are you gonna come over and sing with me after a while?
DOLLY: I . . .
RICKY: I would really love for you to.
DOLLY: I would love to!
RICKY: Well, Iíd love to have you.
DOLLY: So Iíll bring you some food, and Iíll come over and sing with you.
DOLLY: Iím, Iím tryiní to catch a show.
RICKY: That, thatís some fine lookiní tater salad there.
DOLLY: How Ďbout a nice hand for Ricky, and I will see you folks later! (Applause and screams.)
RICKY: Thank you, folks. Come see us! Alright. Thanks, Dolly. Good to see ya.
DOLLY: Iím goní with ya!
RICKY: Oh, good!
DOLLY: Come on! (They exit the stage to applause and cheers as the pickers start up ď9 To 5Ē again.)